Fasting

"And when you fast, do not look gloomy like the hypocrites...but when you fast, anoint your head and wash your face..."-Matthew 6:16

Our pastor recently pointed out during a sermon the fact that the way Jesus addresses the topic of fasting indicates that it's assumed his followers will be fasting. This comes after he talks about praying, which is another normal assumption of the Christian life. Yet how many of us actually fast on a regular basis...or at all? I know I don't. I mean, I have a few times, but it's definitely not a regular part of my life. Sure, I've thought about it many times since taking a class on spiritual disciplines and practicing fasting at that time. But it's hard...I think about doing it, and the idea of going hungry, being tired, trying to concentrate at work with no energy, being distracted by hunger pangs all day long...and somehow I always manage to find an excuse. I know how beneficial it can be, and yet I still can't bring myself to do it.

But it struck me this weekend that I really do need to make a more regular practice of this discipline. And I'm specifically talking about food, but I could make a regular habit of fasting other things as well. Our church called us to fast this past Friday, and some people did it all week, others fasted various things beyond food. I wrote earlier about this...fasting activity, spending money, and then food on Friday. Fasting spending and shopping freed me up a lot. I tend to make several trips to the store during the week, constantly thinking of some food item or toiletry or article of clothing that I "need". But it's not only a money waster, it's also a time waster. This week I made one trip for groceries and didn't make any other shopping trips. Meaning my evenings and lunch times had more free time. Because i took a break from "doing" and being productive, that basically meant my evenings were totally open. And each evening I spent time in prayer, reading my bible, and seeking God. Nothing amazing or out of the ordinary occured out of that time, but I do think it prepared me for Friday and Saturday.

Friday I fasted up until 8, when our church broke our fast together. And it actually wasn't too bad. sure, I was hungry...but there was something peaceful about that discomfort, in that i knew I wasn't being controlled by my desires, by food, by filling myself with something that I so regularly depend on. Fasting from both food and spending helped me to feel more free, as though those things have control over my mind and heart at times. Being disciplined actually made me feel more free. And i expected the fast to be brutal, especially after sleeping for only 3 hours after ministry. But while I was tired, it never felt horrible. By 8 pm I was incredibly tired and ready to eat, but it wasn't the worst thing in the world by any means. And all day i could reflect on how God is the only nourishment that i need, the only that truly satisfies. I've noticed that I'm much more intent and focused on prayer when I fast. I'm not worried about eating, or fitting everything into my lunch time. And knowing that fasting is a great time to really plea to God for something or someone, it made me approach prayer in a much more serious and intentional way. I prayed for myself, but mostly prayed for someone in Hollywood who my heart constantly breaks for. I've thought about fasting for those in Hollywood many times, but haven't "gotten around to it". (In other words, I'm selfish and haven't wanted to put them before me because I hate being hungry. ugh.) I really enjoyed praying for this boy in this way.

Then at church, we broke our fast with communion together...followed by a big celebratory dinner together. In Mark Buchanan's book The Rest of God, he addresses the idea of "staying hungry" and celebrating Sabbath with feasting. He says this,

"In the bible, food is food- a gift of the earth that makes our bones strong and straight, that lends joy to our gatherings-but it is also a picture of something else: the way God fills and nourishes us. Sometimes our feasting expresses this, and sometimes it eclipses it. Sometimes our abundant meals reflect God's abundance. Other times, all our eating dulls us and lulls us into forgetting him altogether...One thing Jesus did in the Eurcharist was to connect eating with obedience and worship. He joined earth with heaven, bread with manna, flesh with Spirit. He linked physical hunger with spiritual hunger. He reminded us that every bite is also a prayer.

Do you eat this way? I have two suggestions for this Sabbath Liturgy. The first is that you receive your very next meal-breakfast, lunch, dinner, whatever-as a gift from both heaven and earth. Partake of it with thankfulness and simplicity, eating just enough to fill you, then stopping. Nourish your Spirit and your body together. Try to do this whenever you eat and drink. The other suggestion is that your next sabbath meal be a fast: a time of enjoying the sheer bounty of God and his creation. Maybe, if you don't do this already, invite others to join you. Overdo it a big. Delight in the utter extravagance of God, who does exceeding, abundantly more than all we ask or imagine."


I felt that's what we were able to experience on Friday...relying on God to satisfy our hunger through Him alone during the day. Then at night, celebrating together in his abundance and the amazing things he had done that week in many lives and for our church. And we were all provided a meal, for free, and a taste of God's goodness through food and fellowship with his family.

On Saturday I woke up, slightly hungry, and thinking that I didn't have that urge to just quench the hunger right away. There was something about it that compelled me towards Christ, something about satisfying it so quickly and easily that just felt like a distraction from God and as though that's what was filling me, not God. I ended up eating just a little and going to a conference at church slightly hungry. In the afternoon at that conference, we later took the Lord's Supper once again. Something about it this time hit me much more than the previous night, oddly enough, since I had eaten a plentiful lunch. But the taste and feel of the delicious bread in my mouth made me think back to the previous night. That God provides and sustains us. That he died for us for that. That the pleasures of this world, the acceptance of others, the things I can do and attain, the approval I can win from others...none of it satisfy or fill me. Or if they do, it is not the food I should be relying on, only God should be doing that for me. It hit me that I didn't need to try so hard- to get things done, to get approval and acceptance in whatever way- but that he loves me that much that he died...he gave his body and blood to fill me and every one of my hungers and needs. And in that moment of tasting his body and blood, it hit me how much he already loves and accepts me, and in that I am freed to love others in the same way and never require anything back.

Some very good lessons for just one day of fasting :) um...why don't I do this more?